Prestayn 2009

Are you sitting comfortably? Then I shall begin...

I'm back and I'M ALIVE! My God! What a weekender.

Hoofed it up the centre of the country only to end up in a huge traffic jam on the M6 AFTER we'd paid the toll. I felt as though I'd paid to sit in the jam as opposed to paying for the end of a beautiful journey on the Midlands Express-way. Grrrr. Seven hours later we arrived at Prestatyn Sands and quickly unpacked our gear into our grotty chalet. A quick beer, shower (where, in the excitement, I found myself showering with my bra on! I thought something felt a bit weird LOL) and change of clothes found us heading toward the venue for what turned out to be a very long night indeed.

We excitedly entered the Queen Vic which was the start of the 'hello' season - this didn't stop all weekend! It's just a shame it closes at 11.30 but no matter, a few hours is better than no hours.

Nick Hackett and John Weston were playing when we entered YEEEHAAA! Got chatted up by a lovely looking bloke and I though WooHooo perhaps my lucks changing here. Sadly, he was married. Reluctantly I shuffled back to my party friends and quickly put him out of my mind.

A quick skip, and I mean quick because it smells of cheesy bum cracks, through the modern room into the main arena found me jigging and a joggin to some great music. Right through til 8am!

Laughs a plenty with Dave Rimmer & Co as usual and John Weston stole my fur coat! He sulked when I demanded it back at about 8.30am to go home. Had a lovely chat with Andy McCabe about Middleton so we're looking forward to our pilgrimage in May. Also got bought far too many pints of the amber nectar from people I've never met before as a thank you for my music library. How sweet! Also had a lovely chat with Joe Dutton about doowop and rockin' stuff. Oh, I also bent the ear of the lovely Mr Dyson about Lifeline. Yet another of the great all-nighters that I'm well looking forward to in April.

One girl made a very quick b-line for me, staring straight into my eyes, and I thought fuck, I'm not wearing my kevlar! She grabbed me by the shoulders and shook me gently and I thought right, I'm going to get head butted here or something LOL. Instead, she shrieked GOD I LOVE YOUR HAIR!

Phew! There was to be no murderous attempt on my life and I enjoyed the rest of the evening with gay abandon. I was in and out of the main room making shapes on the dance-floor till sun up.

It was all just too fucking excellent. Soul-Lag was heading my way. By around 4am I was probably talking more bollox than I usually do but it was brilliant. Talking bollox I mean. You end up standing there thinking fuck, what am I talking about! :-D

I partook in a double JD & Coke around 8am. Now that's Soulism for ya! So, the end had come and having retrieved my coat I headed back to the chalet. Blimey, more people there spouting bollox in there :-P Still, I changed into my PJ's and after they'd all left I headed over to Pete Widd's chalet where Rachel and Lindsay were.

Had a cup of tea and made Mick H get out of bed. We all returned to our own chalet where we then embarked on a farting competition. It was like the fucking frog chorus. A combination of too much beer, gear, no food, no sleep blah blah blah. I tried to sleep but it wasn't happening so I got out of my pit, hit the shower and got ready for the afternoon session.

If I'm honest, I just wanted the evening to arrive. I was desperate to get into the Redemption Room for the CW nighter. Still, I spent a pleasant afternoon with friends from near and far; yep, you've got it, talking more bollox.

By this time I was pretty fucking fluent! A few more shape-making attempts on the dance-floor with chit chat interludes in the bar area the evening had arrived. YIPEEE!

I skipped along to the redemption room and plonked my stuff at one of the tall standy-up table by the dance area. I stood watching in awe as Liam danced. It's almost as though he's dancing on air isn't it! Where people dance slowly on the beat, Liam dances like a whirlwind on each half count. Love it, and not a foot out of place. I think it was around 11pm that I thought now might be a good time to actually eat something.

Apart from a manky sandwich on the way up I'd not eaten anything. So, Lindsay and I purchased chicken and chips from just outside the Redemption. Good fucking Lord above! The chips were like soft stale match sticks and the chicken was like a bit of fucking carpet! Liam came over and looked in my box. "any good" he said? "No, it's shite" I replied. I took them back, and in my best voice (which had turned from my usual Ena Sharples gravelly groan into what I can only describe as Orville!) I demanded a refund and said that they should not keep food on the hotplate all day. She made me fill in a form before handing back my £4.00.

Nick Hackett and Mick H, for me anyway, played absolutely blinding spots. I couldn't keep my feet still. The floor was awful to dance on so I tried the carpet but that was just as bad. Like dancing on velcro it was that sticky LOL. The losing of my voice at such an early time caused much piss taking throughout the weekend. Especially by Mick H who surprisingly mimicked me to a T!

So, I was actually feeling fairly weary now. But I wanted to see the Volumes so I headed back to the main arena with my belongings and stood in the back of the Hall. Being very short I had trouble seeing them. The room was packed so there was no way of getting any closer. I sang my heart out to I Love You and I swayed through their Lady in Green. The band sounded good and the harmonies sounded tight. Very very nice indeed.

I took my last photograph at 23.04; I really couldn't be arsed to get it out! By 12.30 I was the walking dead. Void of any life, voice or anything else that could be a form of human life. I went back to the chalet and slept till 4am when Rachel stumbled in making coffee trying to be quiet. Then, after a menthol and a chat I drifted off again only to be awoken around 8am by Lindsay falling through the door LOL.

We all chatted about the preceding night's jollies and I was determined to get into the main venue for a bash on the dance-floor by 12. Plus of course, you've got to get there that early to secure a table! We left lindsay asleep upright in bed. I said to Rachel that was a fair thing to do as she'd not slept at all really. We had numerous guests at our table throughout the afternoon and I danced my weary arse off.

That Carol McCarthy got the room banging. I remember her doing that at the Christmas Middleton; that's how I remembered her because her set made me look up to the stage to see who it was. On this occasion, she did exactly the same. But what I realllly love about this girl is her massive attitude behind the decks! She danced to every one of her records; it was great to see such enthusiasm! Some were a wee bit fast for my 50mph gait on a Sunday afternoon but I thoroughly enjoyed it.

Pete Widd dancing in his flip flops and drinking half pints of Baileys was the highlight of the afternoon LOL. And by 5pm I was vying for floor space as the venue had padded out quite nicely. I presented Dave Rimmer with a special gift. A police helmet with Soul Police written on the front, complete with a blue flashing light! He wore it for his set in the main room LOL.Anyway, 7pm arrived so we headed back to the Queen Vic.

Hell and high water could not have kept me away from the Connoisseur night. All 5 of the DJ's delivered what can only be described as a multiple orgasm! In fact, most of the weekend I'd been walking around with a wee damp patch but tonight I moved on from the plateau and finished myself off LOL. Shirley Wood and I were discussing the best way to fashion her balloons into a cock but it was a bit beyond our artistic abilities. Story of my life!

Keith Money and John Weston. What can I say! There are few words left in my befuddled brain that would go anywhere near explaining how awesome these guys are together. An absolute pleasure to watch and listen to. I was on over-drive now and had to keep my feet moving for fear of sitting down and falling asleep. Then I get hit by my two fave records (Harvey Averne and Soul Inc) and went into baboon mode. Had a twirl on the slippy tiled floor and went back to nurse my pint. At this stage I wasn't really enjoying my beer any more. Steve Greens Wife, Vicky, even creamed her own pants during this particular set. Welcome to my world Vicky! :-P

Talking of cracking one off, I cracked a bloody tooth on the Friday night soon after arriving... on a bit of chewing gum that someone insisted I had from them! Great! The Volumes came in and sat down to have a listen. We all took the opportunity to have our photo's taken with them and they were very hospitable. I hope they enjoyed the weekend. 11.30 came all too soon.

Yet again I found myself hurriedly scurrying through the modern room with that awful stink back to the main arena. I was, by this time, physically and mentally numb. I was spent. Sleep and food deprivation had taken it's toll. I sat in the bar area trying to munch on another bit of carpet which Dave Rimmer found quite funny and which I left on the table not having the strength to chew the fucking thing.

I had by this time acquired a Princess Tiara which I thought looked very nice. Full fur coat and a tiara; how decadent haha. I think I took leave around 1.30am - I sat there through music I would normally throw myself around to unable to move - it was horrible.

I almost crawled back to the chalet on all fours. So, that was it. Another Prestatyn over and done with and on the way out I booked up for next year. I can't begin to tell you what a laugh we all had. The great conversations, the brilliant music, the electric atmosphere. Soulism at it's best. Thanks this year to Andy McCabe for the Middleton bash in the Vic. To Carl Willingham for the awesome Redemption room and to all the DJ's on the Sunday night in the Queen Vic. And a big thank you to my lovely besty mates Lindsay and Rachel. What a scream :)